I wrote this post yesterday, in my notebook, so there will be two of these for today. Hope that doesn't bother anyone.
My body hurts, my contacts are bothering me. This is a day in my life. Since losing my job, I’ve been forced to do mundane activities and relish them. I don’t know if I’m complaining or not. Don’t get me wrong, it’s kind of nice to have nothing to do; I haven’t had “nothing to do” for about 8 years now, and it’s been pretty relaxing. Reality is coming at me though and since I have $0 income to support my 8-year-old (Except for the $200 or so from freelancing), I need to get cracking in doing so. Until then though, it’s people watching for me at my local Starbucks.
Directly across from me, with the sounds of firetrucks blazing as background music, sits two men. Two, overly muscled, oldish guys. They are probably “dude” guys who live their life at Starbucks and the gym trying to outdo each other with the size of their biceps. They probably do this to impress the nonexistent girls who are into their “dudeness”. Not that there aren’t girls who are into that, just none at this Starbucks.
These two Dudes’ conversation is littered with “brah” and “fucker”, so they don’t sound too intelligent. For all I know though, one might have a major in aerospace engineering, so I’ll try not to judge too much. What’s funny is that one of these guys just finished telling another guy (who did not look like a “dude” and wasn’t sitting with these two muscled fellas) that he had been spending his day worshipping the Lord. I suppose the Lord doesn’t mind being called “Brah” and “Fuckah”.
Speaking of the Lord, I jus tread an article about Jonestown the other day. Until today, I’ve heard about Jonestown, but was truly ignorant about what went down. Wow. Yes, that’s all I can say. It truly baffles me that people could have so much faith in one person that they would kill themselves for it. Perhaps it speaks more about me then them though. I would never put myself into that kind of situation or have that much trust in someone to take my life away. Makes you wonder what happened to them when they died. I can believe whatever I want to about death, but who knows what really happens? Is there reincarnation, heaven, nirvana, nothing? I also suppose it say sa lot about a person when they are no longer afraid of death.
Me? I still don’t want to die. I have too many unresolved issues in life. Too many things to do, to find out, people to meet. I mean, hell, as of right now I don’t even know what my profession is. Sheesh.
I suppose, if anything, I’ll always be a writer. Maybe not ever an Author, but I write for the love of doing it. Unfortunately, I’ve been rather lax about it lately, but since I have time, I can pick it up again, I suppose. You can choose a profession, but what you ARE is ingrained in you no matter what you do.
I suppose it’s time to go pick up Ryder from school…more tomorrow.